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When you have a sister who's a narcissist...

Are you on that last little nerve? Need to get something off your chest?

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by Tigger » Sun Jun 25, 2017 5:07 am

...or something similar. Maybe just extremely self absorbed or insecure.

And you're forced to listen to her broadcast about her, her, her for about 45 mins on the phone.

And then she finally asks you about your son and interrupts to TELL YOU that he looked fine to her in that picture you sent.

And you get off the phone and want to crawl in a hole and stay there.
_______

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by Duckysmom » Sun Jun 25, 2017 5:16 am

Tigger, I have one of those in my family as well. Tough to deal with. Makes me want to slap them silly!

And I can't tell you how many times I've been told I don't look BP. What should a BP person look like?

Don't crawl into the hole. It's on her, not you. You can't control anyone's behavior, just how you respond to it. You're a great mom dealing with a tough situation and so much stronger than her.
"Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one."
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by Tigger » Sun Jun 25, 2017 11:00 am

Thank you :)

The good news is that I find myself very aware of how I listen to other people after I'm subjected to one of her broadcast "talks."
_______

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by Mocha » Sun Jun 25, 2017 1:59 pm

When you have a sister who's a narcissist...

Could be worse........how about when you have a president who is a narcissist?......:lol:...:lol:


Not A Professional of Any Kind ~ Just Your Garden Variety Nutjob

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

~Martin Luther King~
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by Redwhitblu » Sun Jun 25, 2017 4:52 pm

Hey! ^Narcissists actually make for great leaders! That's a fact.

Now, what you don't want is a mother in law and sister in law with classic narcissistic personality disorder. I can tell you first hand. Everything must revolve around them, be all about them and the mother in law will lead and orchestrate everything, like a puppet master. This behavior might work well in s leadership role, professionally. But isn't so great interpersonally, within families.
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by Tigger » Sun Jun 25, 2017 5:34 pm

Ah, Mocha. I know. I was born in NYC and grew up outside of NYC. NY'ers and New Englanders have had his number for a long time.

RedW-I've had one confirmed narcissist in my life (a boss) and one potential (my sister). It does not work well professionally or personally. Unless these people have close enablers that allow them to function and they buffer the immediate impact. But I've seen this up close. No one wins.
_______

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by Mocha » Mon Jun 26, 2017 7:39 am

Tigger wrote:Ah, Mocha. I know. I was born in NYC and grew up outside of NYC. NY'ers and New Englanders have had his number for a long time.

:lol: :lol:

Not A Professional of Any Kind ~ Just Your Garden Variety Nutjob

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~Martin Luther King~
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by Redwhitblu » Mon Jun 26, 2017 9:11 am

Ha! Very true indeed, Mocha. About the enablers part. Problem is, my husband is one of the enablers of his narcissistic mother. He learned to be this way from his father- her husband. She is the source of the majority of our marital issues. I still haven't figured out how to deal.

Tigger, in an attempt to deal with my own extremely narcissistic MIL I did read quite a bit that setting and enforcing healthy boundaries is the key with this type. When boundaries are crossed, a low contact or no contact is then implemented. You might find this easier to do in your situation. I find I'm unable to do it bc my husband, the enabler, removes that power from me.
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by AvantGarde » Mon Jun 26, 2017 11:08 am

Been dealing with narcissists all my life, they are set in being number one and have no idea what they do to achieve that spotlight. Even if that means destroying the planet, the culture of a country, having absolutely no respect for other leaders besides the ones that can give them money. The leaders part. Not in my country but in my planet so I give a damn.

My uncle is a narcissist, and all he cares about is himself and money. Made a parody of my mother's life, threatened her and told her she should die. The family members part.

My abusive ex was a narcissist, emphasis on the abuser and on the ex. All he cared about was destroying the people that cared about him and having all he wanted for whatever that means. Exs part.

Sometimes the best we can do is go no contact, if we can't it's better if we stay low contact.
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by Tigger » Thu Jun 29, 2017 7:14 am

Narcissists are horrible, toxic people who bring chaos to life. Living under the rule of a narcissist makes everyone feel like crap: whether that's a parent, a boss or the president of a country.

I keep my distance with my family. But they are still my family and I need to interact with them on occasion. I just always feel pretty awful afterward.
_______

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