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I'm manic

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by hal » Tue Dec 05, 2017 3:35 am

I'm manic. Like the last time, the main trigger was political. About a year ago, when Trump was elected so unexpectedly, everybody was shocked and lots of people reacted with very powerful emotions.

I was pretty cool. It wasn't the result I wanted, but my response was to merely to shake my head. Wow, how could this have happened?

Next day I was watching the talking heads on TV. (For those of you who don't know, these are the politicos on the news networks who exchange opinions all day long.) Someone said, how can this have happened?

I was sorta surprised. Why, EYE know how it happened! So I rushed to my computer and wrote a letter to the editor of the local newspaper. They almost always publish my letters, and so they did this time.

That did it. This was the experience that put me in the worst of my manias for a long time. A week later, I was in the hospital for the first time in 40 years.

What set me off this time was a new development in the saga of Russian interference with the presidential election and the degree to which Trump and company were involved. Trump and his lawyers had always strenuously denied there was any collusion by his campaign and that in particular Trump had not committed obstruction of justice. But then Trump sent out a tweet which more or less admitted that he had obstructed because he knew one of his lieutenants had lied to the FBI.

This news simmered over the weekend. Then yesterday the Trump camp completely reversed its position. Now his lawyer said Trump could not possibly be guilty of obstruction because, as President, he is the chief law enforcement official of the country and in that role cannot be guilty of a crime. As Richard Nixon put it long ago, in the Watergate context, if the President does it, it can’t be illegal. Moreover, he cannot be guilty of collusion because collision is not even defined as a crime in the Constitution or in federal law.

The talking heads soon demolished that argument. And so we are left with a situation that could become a constitutional crisis.

And I’m manic.
. . . all times I have enjoyed
Greatly, have suffered greatly, both with those
That loved me, and alone.
-- Tennyson
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by AvantGarde » Tue Dec 05, 2017 3:49 am

Hal, I don't know if you're going to heed my advice or not, but I have to steer away from the news and so should you. I get them once a week/every two weeks just to keep myself updated, but I can no longer muster the strenght for this every day debacle that the world has become. And you know much I love to talk politics lol I'm very opinionated and need to be challenged, but in order to keep my mental health safe I really can't go around trying to make any sense about what's happening.

The world is going to keep turning if we protect ourselves, and even if guys like Trump are in power.

There's this feeling that Trump carries of impending doom on the world that is very frightening, but if something does happen that requires our assitance, we'll be sure know about it. In the meanwhile, I'm really convinced we should protect ourselves if we're sensitive to this crap.

So, no need to tell you, but call your pdoc to avoid the hospital! :)

Love you.
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by skizzedkid » Tue Dec 05, 2017 3:51 am

Hey, there you go. Happy go lucky, ey?
Not making fun of you. I've just always thought that mania and politics are sort of intertwined. Like they feed of eachother. Two beasts suckling one another.
Take it easy, mate.
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by MochaAdmin » Tue Dec 05, 2017 4:02 am

hal, I'm sorry you're feeling this way. I also know what's going on but it hasn't affected me the way it has you......and you already know how I feel about everything.

Do you think part of might be all the traveling you've done lately? Back east to visit family for TG.......and now traveling to see your brother? That kind of thing usually leaves me wound up. Plus it's the holidays and I know you were getting frustrated with the whole decoration thing. Maybe all that left you vulnerable to the current news and your reaction to it?

My only advice is to stay away from the talking heads for a while. Take a break for your own sake. I've had to do that for the past few weeks. I still check in but only in the evening with Rachel Maddow and Lawrence O'Donnel on MSNBC in evening. If I do that......

You don't have to watch/keep up with the news, hal......for your own peace of mind.
It's not going anywhere....... :)

EDIT: Maybe it's time to give your Pdoc a call....get in for therapy, maybe a med adjustment? We don't want you to end up in the hospital again.

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by hal » Tue Dec 05, 2017 4:04 am

I'm a big watcher rather than a participant in politics. And I mean BIG. So it would be hard to quit cold turkey. But I'll certainly think about it, AG. Thanks for the advice.

Currently I'm on a trip and will be back home late tomorrow. I'll call pdoc on Thursday.
. . . all times I have enjoyed
Greatly, have suffered greatly, both with those
That loved me, and alone.
-- Tennyson
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by hal » Tue Dec 05, 2017 4:13 am

MochaAdmin wrote:[color=#000000]
Do you think part of might be all the traveling you've done lately? Back east to visit family for TG.......and now traveling to see your brother? That kind of thing usually leaves me wound up. Plus it's the holidays and I know you were getting frustrated with the whole decoration thing. Maybe all that left you vulnerable to the current news and your reaction to it?
I'm glad we're having this conversation because if not I wouldn't be thinking like you guys are, realistically!

MochaAdmin wrote:My only advice is to stay away from the talking heads for a while. Take a break for your own sake. I've had to do that for the past few weeks. I still check in but only in the evening with Rachel Maddow and Lawrence O'Donnel on MSNBC in evening. If I do that......
Okay, I will lay off at least until I get home, which means until Thursday evening, because I'm away from the house all day Thursday.

I LOVE Rachel Maddow, and I think her show last night was her best ever!
. . . all times I have enjoyed
Greatly, have suffered greatly, both with those
That loved me, and alone.
-- Tennyson
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by dubious66 » Tue Dec 05, 2017 5:22 am

Hal,

You know the crazy political (and societal) world triggers you. You've dealt with this illness long enough that you know how to take a step back and protect yourself. (Also, I know typically travel doesn't mess with you, but I do think the flipping through multiple timezones could be contributing. And, while family is wonderful, I am guessing there could be some hard pieces there as well.) So, my not so profound suggestion: shut off the relentless talking heads! The man in an oval will keep doing and saying stupid shit whether you watch or not, but the world will keep turning. We just may need to do some cleanup down the road. As you point out, we've had to do that before...

Deep breathing. Center and quiet yourself.

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by hal » Tue Dec 05, 2017 6:21 am

I've been thinking about meditating. I have a couple of hours before I go see my brother, so I'm going to sit down and do it in a minute. Not for two hours, though. :lol:
. . . all times I have enjoyed
Greatly, have suffered greatly, both with those
That loved me, and alone.
-- Tennyson
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by Spm24 » Tue Dec 05, 2017 10:10 am

Meditate it might help :P . Can't hurt anything.

Manic again. Hopefully you can keep it in check till you can get back to familiar ground.

Good vibes heading your way...
Snowflakes gently floating from the sky just dusting the ground. Then it picks up bigger fatter flakes cascading from space at a faster rate. From a dusting to a trace. Then the deluge comes. Oh what joy. Watching everything slow to a crawl, then a stop. Step outside and even with things moving it is quiet. It is a giant muffler the earth is wearing. Causing everything to be muted.To be calm.
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by MochaAdmin » Tue Dec 05, 2017 4:04 pm

hal, believe it or not I just walked away when it became to much of a trigger for me. And like I said, you know how I was before.....

I changed my habits big time. Now the only thing I watch on tv during the day are reruns of comedies I like.....or dramas....nothing to do with politics.....And at night I still have my favs....including the late night talk shows, John Oliver......laughter is the best medicine dude....... :)

I also listen to music more. You have your poetry and your literature, yes?

There's nothing you can do about any of the stuff that's going on. As dub said, the world will keep turning whether we're obsessing about the news/current events or not.

You'll be surprised at how much better you'll feel........ :)

Not a Professional of Any Kind ~ Just Your Garden Variety Nutjob

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.
~Martin Luther King Jr.~
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by hal » Tue Dec 05, 2017 8:11 pm

Did I mention somewhere I'm visiting my brother, who's in very poor health?Anyway, I spent the day very quietly with him. Very relaxed. Nothing to push the mania.
. . . all times I have enjoyed
Greatly, have suffered greatly, both with those
That loved me, and alone.
-- Tennyson
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by hal » Thu Dec 07, 2017 8:55 am

I'm at the stage where you clean out and reorganize everything. Also, of course, more talkative. Euphoria, but slow and easy. Enjoying people more than usual. Notice details more (contrary to my psychological type). Feel that I have more insights. If it could only stay like this....
. . . all times I have enjoyed
Greatly, have suffered greatly, both with those
That loved me, and alone.
-- Tennyson
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by AvantGarde » Thu Dec 07, 2017 9:01 am

How long until you call your pdoc? Try no to wait too long.

That stage of the high is cool though :D
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by AvantGarde » Thu Dec 07, 2017 10:38 am

Heeey was browsing the web while eating dinner and stumbled across this article :D

https://blog.usejournal.com/the-scale-o ... 84462a834b
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by Pancake » Thu Dec 07, 2017 12:22 pm

*sparkling* Hal.

Hope you're ok though. It's been a big year...
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by Jemane » Thu Dec 07, 2017 12:36 pm

How are you doing Hal?
I’d it long before you’ll see your pdoc?
Politics usually makes me depressed rather than manic but I can totally see how it could have that effect.
All the best.
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by Spm24 » Thu Dec 07, 2017 1:06 pm

How did your visit go? Are you calling your pdoc in the morning?
Snowflakes gently floating from the sky just dusting the ground. Then it picks up bigger fatter flakes cascading from space at a faster rate. From a dusting to a trace. Then the deluge comes. Oh what joy. Watching everything slow to a crawl, then a stop. Step outside and even with things moving it is quiet. It is a giant muffler the earth is wearing. Causing everything to be muted.To be calm.
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by hal » Thu Dec 07, 2017 3:09 pm

The visit was good. Had an enjoyable time with my brother and his daughter and granddaughter. I was glad to see him up close for a few days. He has a lot of conditions but is his usual wry, cheerful self. But he showed me his meds list: there must be at least 30 on it. His Parkinson's has bent him over and makes his head droop every 5-6 seconds and he has to jerk it up. It slurs his speech a little too. He has many of the complications of diabetes. Plus, he has developed shortness of breath and will need to get on oxygen.

I already had an appointment with pdoc on Dec. 19. I'll call him tomorrow.
. . . all times I have enjoyed
Greatly, have suffered greatly, both with those
That loved me, and alone.
-- Tennyson
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by hal » Fri Dec 08, 2017 5:01 pm

Today wasn't so euphoric. Although I slept well (5.5 hours), I was antsy all day. Also, very impatient, angry with my wife. A little confused at times. It got better in the evening.
. . . all times I have enjoyed
Greatly, have suffered greatly, both with those
That loved me, and alone.
-- Tennyson
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by Spm24 » Fri Dec 08, 2017 5:28 pm

To hear that this evening was better for you. Being impatient and angry with your wife is no good. I am sure she understands though....
Snowflakes gently floating from the sky just dusting the ground. Then it picks up bigger fatter flakes cascading from space at a faster rate. From a dusting to a trace. Then the deluge comes. Oh what joy. Watching everything slow to a crawl, then a stop. Step outside and even with things moving it is quiet. It is a giant muffler the earth is wearing. Causing everything to be muted.To be calm.
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by AvantGarde » Fri Dec 08, 2017 9:39 pm

Good morning hal :) Going to be annoying... Called pdoc yet? Called pdoc yet? Called pdoc yet?

Call pdoc. Call pdoc. Call pdoc.

/annoyance over.

Love you!
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by Pancake » Sat Dec 09, 2017 4:43 am

AvantGarde wrote:Good morning hal :) Going to be annoying... Called pdoc yet? Called pdoc yet? Called pdoc yet?

Call pdoc. Call pdoc. Call pdoc.

/annoyance over.

Love you!

:lol:
How are you today?
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by hal » Sat Dec 09, 2017 6:17 am

I called pdoc and he called back, left a message, and said he would call back later but (unusually) didn't.

All the files are missing on my wife's computer. How that could have happened is beyond me. There have been other strange things happening with that computer, and maybe it's a piece of malware that's just messing with us. But malware is all about money or politics these days, so I can't imagine it. We have backups in the cloud, so I set out to do a restore. But I couldn't get in to my account. Fussed with it quite a while. This morning I found I hadn't read the instructions carefully enough.

Scatterheadedness.

Sleep okay last night.
. . . all times I have enjoyed
Greatly, have suffered greatly, both with those
That loved me, and alone.
-- Tennyson
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by MochaAdmin » Sat Dec 09, 2017 7:51 am

Hal.....this may be a stupid question, but do you run your malware, spyware, antivirus, etc scans regularly? My malware/spyware runs automatically every day..........antivirus runs automatically every five days. Paranoid? Yes.......lol......

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by AvantGarde » Sat Dec 09, 2017 8:27 am

MochaAdmin wrote:Paranoid? Yes.......lol......


:lol: Better safe than sorry
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