Bipolar Support Forums To Share and Support One Another

Not doing too well

Have a case of the blues? Sad? Or in that dark place we all know far too well? Well, pull up a chair, order a cup of your favorite brew and tell us all about it. We're ready to listen, and offer our support and understanding.

by Karen79 » Fri Apr 21, 2017 8:34 am

So I'm new to this site. I haven't really joined any support groups for my bipolar before. Even with the anonymity I always get nervous I'll be recognized. Even after more than 10yrs being diagnosed I'm still ashamed. I just came off a major depressive episode and right into a mixed episode. Now I think I'm headed right back into a depressed episode again. Or maybe I never really got out of it. I'm kinda scared of what I might do. But I don't want to be a burden to anyone especially since they just helped me out of one. I don't have an appt til the beginning of May with my pdoc. He doesn't have anything sooner. I feel more dangerous now than I did when I was really depressed. I just want this to end. At this point I don't care which ending I get.
Karen79
 
Posts: 38
Joined: Wed Apr 19, 2017 7:23 am

by Duckysmom » Fri Apr 21, 2017 8:50 am

So many of us have been where you are at and I'm sorry you're going through it. You have my empathy as I just went down thatroad myself recently. Please call your pdoc to see if you can get an emergency apt. Or go to the ER. At the very least, call a hotline and talk to someone. Do you have a therapist you can call?
"Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one."
Bruce Lee
User avatar
Duckysmom
 
Posts: 879
Joined: Sun Aug 14, 2016 8:52 am

by AvantGarde » Fri Apr 21, 2017 8:52 am

Hey Karen, welcome. I'm sorry you're struggling so much. Do you have a therapist to who you talk to? It's very important with this illness to be in touch with both a pdoc (psychiatrist) and tdoc (therapist). It can help you a lot to go through the motions.

Do you know what triggered this depressive episode? Or just came out of the blue? That happens too.
"You don’t suffer from a sense of superiority – you’re remarkably modest for an emperor of all humanity."
User avatar
AvantGarde
Site Admin
 
Posts: 3127
Joined: Mon Jun 20, 2016 7:01 am

by Karen79 » Fri Apr 21, 2017 9:07 am

Duckysmom I'm sorry you just went down this road. Avantgaurd I don't know what triggered it. Maybe stress overload? But I thought I was better. I just called my tdoc. We are going to talk over the phone later but I really don't see a point. There's no way I'm going to get myself committed. I worked hard to get where I'm at in my job and I don't want to risk losing it. I'm a nurse and I don't want to give them an excuse to look to firing me.
Karen79
 
Posts: 38
Joined: Wed Apr 19, 2017 7:23 am

by AvantGarde » Fri Apr 21, 2017 10:13 am

I see. I understand your situation, I agree with Ducky on the helpline though. And I'm glad you'll be talking to your tdoc on the phone, that should help some.

You can always go to the rant/vent forum here and vent your frustrations, or to the blues cafe and let us know how you're feeling and what you're feeling so we might be able to help you out some. I know in my darkest days it's been a life saver :)
"You don’t suffer from a sense of superiority – you’re remarkably modest for an emperor of all humanity."
User avatar
AvantGarde
Site Admin
 
Posts: 3127
Joined: Mon Jun 20, 2016 7:01 am

by hal » Fri Apr 21, 2017 2:22 pm

Welcome to BPS, Karen. :) You're welcome to talk to us about anything. We won't judge you, and you can learn from our experience as we will from yours. That's the idea!
. . . all times I have enjoyed
Greatly, have suffered greatly, both with those
That loved me, and alone.
-- Tennyson
User avatar
hal
Moderator
 
Posts: 1260
Joined: Wed Aug 13, 2014 1:54 pm
Location: Iowa


Return to Blues Cafe