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Bipolar parents?

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by Alison » Wed May 10, 2017 2:24 pm

Hey guys, I am looking into something and I was wondering....was anyone raised by bipolar parent(s)? If so, would you share if you feel that your childhood was affected, and if it was positive or negative? I don't want to upset anyone by bringing up stories from the past at all. I am not asking for details. Thanks if you are able to reply, and have a great night, or day, depending on where you live! :)
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by Duckysmom » Wed May 10, 2017 3:36 pm

I am a BP parent and it was hard on my daughter her first 10 years before I was finally properly diagnosed and started on meds and therapy. But I talked to her about it, let her ask questions, came up with little sayings, as simple as "Mommy's not feeling herself today." Her biggest fear all those years was that she was the reason for all my mood swings. Once she knew that she wasn't things got better for her.

I think my dad is BP, have begged my mom to get him evaluated. He's been hospitalized once in the past year, but all they did was make sure he wasn't going to harm himself or others, gave him some prescriptions he never took and sent him to a therapist, with whom I am sure he covers himself with by not being honest. I called his tdoc once myself. She was very concerned . He stopped seeing her soon after. Growing up, I never knew if Jeckle or Hyde was going to walk through the door. Like my daughter, I internalized it and just kept trying to be a better kid to make dad happy, so he wouldn't be depressed or angry. I liked the happy dad. But he would always change back to the unhappy dad eventually. It's gotten worse as he's gotten older. Unmedicated BP does get worse and I would bet my life that he is. He just won't do anything about it. He hates my dx, doesn't really support me on it, but doesn't cause me grief about it either. He just ignores it.
I probably haven't answered your question. Just offering my experience.
"Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one."
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by Jemane » Wed May 10, 2017 4:51 pm

My dad didn't have bipolar but he had severe depression and ended trying to kill himself (fortunately he didn't succeed).
I think it really effected me as a young adult when I knew more about what was going on.
I had to organise his admission into hospital. My younger siblings didn't realise the extent of how sick he was as we shielded it from them.
You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.
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by hal » Wed May 10, 2017 6:48 pm

My dad had BP, though not diagnosed as such. He was difficult to live with. He was normally pretty quiet, but he would blow up out of nowhere. His depressions were palpable, and he self-medicated with alcohol. I tried to keep out of his way. I went away from home for a few years, then came back temporarily (age 23). When I came back from a Christmas party on the mountain, he was waiting, drunk. He accused me of criminal negligence because my tires were practically bald. My brother just ignored it, but I wanted to talk to him about it, and so we did. This was the first time we had had an adult-adult discussion. It was rewarding. From that time on I felt very different about him.
. . . all times I have enjoyed
Greatly, have suffered greatly, both with those
That loved me, and alone.
-- Tennyson
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by AvantGarde » Wed May 10, 2017 10:00 pm

Like hal, my father was unmedicated and alcoholic. He was a complicated person, left when I was three to find treatment but no treatment ever worked on him.

A lot of quasi-abusive things happened and he almost died a bunch of times from drinking and not eating, we found him (his daughters) all of the times.

I went no contact with him in the last two years of his life because he made my life a living hell.

His life was probably hell as well, but I needed to protect myself.
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