Bipolar Support Forums To Share and Support One Another

Just kicked my daughter out

A place for Moms, Dads, and Parents-to-be.

by crazymama30 » Tue Apr 25, 2017 5:36 pm

Hi all. I have a 20 year old daughter who has been living with me, dx'd with bipolar, non compliant with meds, parties alot. I just told her I want her to move out by June. I feel bad as she just quit her job, but I just cannot subsidize her partying any more.
just keep swimming
crazymama30
 
Posts: 109
Joined: Sun Jun 22, 2014 10:17 am

by Mocha » Tue Apr 25, 2017 5:57 pm

crazymama30 wrote:Hi all. I have a 20 year old daughter who has been living with me, dx'd with bipolar, non compliant with meds, parties alot. I just told her I want her to move out by June. I feel bad as she just quit her job, but I just cannot subsidize her partying any more.

(First of all I want to say I have experience with this with my own two sons......I'm not just talking out my ass. Wanted to make that clear.)

Sometimes we do have to set those boundaries with our kids, no matter the situation. My parents set them with me and I set them with my sons.

And now you're setting them with your daughter, and that's perfectly fine. I think it's very reasonable that you're giving her an advance notice. If she was trying to take care of her bp, and other responsibilities it would be a different story, but she's not. And she won't as long as she knows you'll take care of her with no consequences. Hopefully this wake up call will be just what she needs.


Not A Professional of Any Kind ~ Just Your Garden Variety Nutjob

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

~Martin Luther King~
User avatar
Mocha
Site Admin
 
Posts: 5441
Joined: Thu Jun 12, 2014 9:37 pm
Location: The North Coast

by crazymama30 » Tue Apr 25, 2017 6:06 pm

I hope so Mocha ( I just posted another thread too, I am a bit of a mess right now).

I just know that by the time I was her age I worked full time, had 1 baby and another on the way. I had issues, but I did not mooch off anyone. I still don't.

She sees pdoc, will not go back to her tdoc. Pdoc tries to help her, but she will not take her meds on a regular basis. My tdoc put it that she was making the choice to not manage her bp, if she had diabetes and chose not to manage it she would have consequences and these are her consequences to not managing her bp. If she was trying then it would be different.

It is hard, as I see her headed down the exact same path my ex went down. I so don't want that for her, but I have to let go and let her find herself, whomever that may be.
just keep swimming
crazymama30
 
Posts: 109
Joined: Sun Jun 22, 2014 10:17 am

by AvantGarde » Tue Apr 25, 2017 10:12 pm

Good for you crazymama. And I agree it might be a wake up call for her.

A hug, I know it's not easy.
Genetically evolved chicken at your service

My therapist says I don't have crazy eyes


Image
User avatar
AvantGarde
Site Admin
 
Posts: 5548
Joined: Mon Jun 20, 2016 7:01 am

by Mocha » Tue Apr 25, 2017 10:16 pm

I know it's not easy....wasn't for me either.

I'm going to read your other post.
Not A Professional of Any Kind ~ Just Your Garden Variety Nutjob

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

~Martin Luther King~
User avatar
Mocha
Site Admin
 
Posts: 5441
Joined: Thu Jun 12, 2014 9:37 pm
Location: The North Coast

by Blake's Poisontree » Fri Jun 23, 2017 5:06 pm

I can understand your situation but I cannot fully agree with your decision to kick her out. Is she capable of looking after herself? My dad send me to the army for the same reason, back in the conscription days so I had no say in the matter. It did more damage than good. After my service I took off and refused to have anything to do with them. I lost whatever support I had and went ahead and totally destroyed what was left of my life.

Even though I am not in your position some of my clients are young people that were kicked out by their parents because of their actions when they were not well or compliant with their medication. A lot of them end up homeless and eventually in hospital and then on a long difficult road to recovery. I would rather explore other options, unfortunately I can't say what because I don't know the details and what resources you have available to you.
I don't have a God complex, God is not this complex.
Blake's Poisontree
 
Posts: 85
Joined: Sun Apr 12, 2015 1:29 pm
Location: New Zealand


Return to Bipolar Parents