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Having a difficult time at my job!

Talk about meds, side effects, and the 'med-go-round'.

by Jessb31 » Wed Sep 06, 2017 8:06 am

Hello everyone. I was diagnosed with Bipolar at the age of 30 I'm now 36. It's recently been getting worse my doctor added Trileptal to my cocktail but I'm having a hard time at work. I'm a Medical receptionist been there for 10 years. My boss came to me told me I was getting complaints(first time in 10 years). I noticed my bipolar getting worse I was really irritable and would get mad at everything. The complaints from patients were about me intimidating them, acting rude, being really short. So to make a long story short I don't remember acting this way at all. Could I be doing this and not knowing? Now none of my co workers will speak to me, they all avoid me. They say I have an attitude and am rude to them but I just don't remember acting this way. My husband says st home I'm very short with him? Has anyone experienced this before? I'm afraid I'm going to lose my job it's like everyone is out to get me!
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by Spm24 » Wed Sep 06, 2017 8:22 am

jeesb31,

Welcome to the forum.
Did you have this issue before the recent addition of a new med?
It is possible to be irritable and not even notice it. I have never had it this way. Yes I have been irritable, but not for to long. Short spurts here and there. But everyone is different and meds affect everyone differently. I would discuss this with your pdoc. Tell them what is going on. Before it is too late with your job.
Snowflakes gently floating from the sky just dusting the ground. Then it picks up bigger fatter flakes cascading from space at a faster rate. From a dusting to a trace. Then the deluge comes. Oh what joy. Watching everything slow to a crawl, then a stop. Step outside and even with things moving it is quiet. It is a giant muffler the earth is wearing. Causing everything to be muted.To be calm.
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by AvantGarde » Wed Sep 06, 2017 8:23 am

Hi Jess, welcome. This is really serious, have you talked to your pdoc about it?

Did this started before or after the new med?
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by Duckysmom » Wed Sep 06, 2017 8:27 am

I can relate to this. I would be told I was irritable and snapping at people and did not realize I was doing it. My BF and I came up with a code word he could say to let me know in a gentle way that I was behaving that way. I have not had that problem at work that I know of. No one has complained to my boss. And my boss is aware of my BP and PTSD. He would not hesitate to let me know if there was a problem. I think I'm just pretty good at not letting my "mask" slip at work. I tend to be very submissive for the most part, though, at work.

Recognizing is the first step. Watching out how you are responding to things and trying to make yourself aware. Are you seeing a tdoc (therapist)? Mine really helped me to recognize the signs that I might be heading up or down and that's when I get short-tempered.

Did you ask for specific examples of these instances? Some people just take things wrong and it's all perspective. Does the doctor you work for know of your diagnosis?
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by 50calty » Wed Sep 06, 2017 8:52 am

I'm the same way and currently in this mode. I was on ablifiy to help this. Med just makes me tired. Been off it for 3 months. But I'm afraid I need to get on it. Almost got into a fight at work yesterday. Call your pdoc and get something. You can't fix this on your own. For me it's a warning sign of suicide thoughts next. Best of luck.
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by Stuckles » Wed Sep 06, 2017 9:28 am

Hi Jessb,

I too can relate to this and have been in similar situations. Yes, some of it was disproportionte reactions to situations due to BP and I have had actual outbursts that could have ended very badly.

Other parts of it were down to the fact that everyone knew me as this kind, good natured guy. The one day I got fed up with everyone shoving their work on my lap and sherking their responsibilities, everyone was suddenly shocked and surprised when I started getting serious with subortinates and co-workers.

I agree in that it depends on how people are perceiving your actions and whether your actions were justified proportionally to the situation.
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by Jessb31 » Wed Sep 06, 2017 9:41 am

This happened back in July, before I got put on the new med. I told my med doc about it and she put me on trileptal along with my other meds. I've been more aware of how Im acting while Im at work. My boss couldnt give me any examples of what I did or said to patients. I called my union rep she was there at the meeting she asked for specific names and my boss would not give the names. I do not get along with my boss at all. Everyone at my work is in a clique except me. I used to talk and be friendly with them, now everyone just ignores me. Ive been here a long time, longer than anyone else and Im not about to leave and find a new job at a lower pay rate. I feel very singled out it might be me overthinking things I dont know.
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by Jessb31 » Wed Sep 06, 2017 9:44 am

I do other weird things at home too, I clean for hours then get mad at my husband or son if they use one of the bathrooms I just spend hours cleaning. I got mad at my husband for eating a hamburger bun because they were supposed to be saved for the weekend. I get mad when dishes are left in the sink, I dont know if this is part of my bp or not.
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by AvantGarde » Wed Sep 06, 2017 10:41 am

Are you in therapy? Therapy can help a great deal.
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by Jessb31 » Mon Sep 11, 2017 9:26 am

I do see a therapist maybe about once a month and I discuss so many other things I never get time to bring these things up. Im thinking I should start going more often.
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by Spm24 » Mon Sep 11, 2017 10:19 am

If you have things that never seem to have the time to be discussed you might want to go more than once a month. That way you have the time to talk about all you need to right now.
Snowflakes gently floating from the sky just dusting the ground. Then it picks up bigger fatter flakes cascading from space at a faster rate. From a dusting to a trace. Then the deluge comes. Oh what joy. Watching everything slow to a crawl, then a stop. Step outside and even with things moving it is quiet. It is a giant muffler the earth is wearing. Causing everything to be muted.To be calm.
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by Mocha » Mon Sep 11, 2017 10:28 am

I get mad when dishes are left in the sink,

That seems normal to me......it always pissed me the hell off....still does.....:lol:

I go to therapy twice a week, maybe I'm crazier than most....:lol:......not everyone's cup of tea I know......many of our members go at least once/week, twice a month, whatever.

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The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

~Martin Luther King~
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