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Back to a pdoc after quite the hiatus...

Talk about meds, side effects, and the 'med-go-round'.

by Dubious66 » Sun Aug 27, 2017 3:42 pm

So I was a bit rocky before the last few RL pretty tough weeks... Now? I don't even know how I am, but I am headed to a new pdoc tomorrow. (My old one is a thousand miles away. I thought that was a bit far to go. ;) ) He's a pdoc who also does therapy. Fingers crossed we click. (I can have a bit of an attitude when confronted by asshole egotists.) This isn't the first time I've gone to the carnival to possibly get on the med-go-round ride, but the thought is making me kind of queasy. I am not looking forward to describing historic crazy and current situational stressors. Anyone want to go for me? Anyone? ;)

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by Spm24 » Sun Aug 27, 2017 4:15 pm

I would go if I could. But they might find you crazier then you think you are :shock: .

But on a realistic note I hope you can click with this new pdoc. I'm sure you can handle yourself very well with them. I am sure your attitude is well earned when dealing with them. Your right a thousand miles is hard to get to a pdoc appointment on time.

Telling your story to others is not the easiest thing to do...

Good luck dub....
Snowflakes gently floating from the sky just dusting the ground. Then it picks up bigger fatter flakes cascading from space at a faster rate. From a dusting to a trace. Then the deluge comes. Oh what joy. Watching everything slow to a crawl, then a stop. Step outside and even with things moving it is quiet. It is a giant muffler the earth is wearing. Causing everything to be muted.To be calm.
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by Jemane » Sun Aug 27, 2017 4:36 pm

Hope it goes well Dub.
All the best.
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by AvantGarde » Sun Aug 27, 2017 9:48 pm

Provided plane trip and accomodation is garanteed, I'm game :D

Good luck dub, hopefully you won't find an egotistical asshole.
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by Pancake » Sun Aug 27, 2017 10:11 pm

I can have a bit of an attitude when confronted by asshole egotists.

Nobody likes those jerks.

Good luck (:
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by MochaAdmin » Mon Aug 28, 2017 3:36 am

You'll do just fine, girl. You just have the initial jitters, like we all get when we meet up with someone for the first time. Not unusual at all.

Just calmly tell him what has been going on. Including the situational stressors. But let him know about the other stuff too, saying the situation stuff is making things worse. Obviously....... :roll:

If you don't want him to load you up with several meds at one time, say so. Tell him you had rather start out slow so you'll know what's working and what's not. I do remember you said Seroquel really helped you in times like this. You might want to mention that to him.

Let us know how it goes, ok? And remember, you don't have to get all defensive. He's there to help you. Give him a chance.


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by Dubious66 » Mon Aug 28, 2017 8:20 pm

New pdoc? Reserving judgement. I'll go back in a couple of weeks unless I decide I want to see him sooner. (Trying hard not to let this interfere with work. I've missed so much this month already.) Anyway, talked options, including lithium, landed on baby seroquel for now (300 mg.). Biggest concern: making sure I sleep... Just some hypo symptoms now, but some concern about escalating. More exaggerated mania with depression historically is not a good combo for me.

Ho hum...

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by AvantGarde » Mon Aug 28, 2017 11:38 pm

Hope the seroquel helps, at least for you to sleep well. That, sometimes, is half the battle.

Hug, dub
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by Spm24 » Tue Aug 29, 2017 5:47 am

At least it wasn't an automatic no for the pdoc. Maybe that small does of Seroquel will help you sleep some. Hopefully your hypo does not escalate...
Snowflakes gently floating from the sky just dusting the ground. Then it picks up bigger fatter flakes cascading from space at a faster rate. From a dusting to a trace. Then the deluge comes. Oh what joy. Watching everything slow to a crawl, then a stop. Step outside and even with things moving it is quiet. It is a giant muffler the earth is wearing. Causing everything to be muted.To be calm.
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by Dubious66 » Tue Aug 29, 2017 4:31 pm

Thanks guys. As Mocha hinted at, seroquel has been good to me in the past for quieting my head. I've been a bit of a horse historically so assuming I react the same way, it shouldn't crash me at this dose. :). To be safe, I won't try daytime until at least the weekend, unless someone spikes my tea :shock:
Folks are giving me some leeway because of losing my mom, but I am a bit....oh, let's call it irritable. I don't understand it. If people wouldn't f*k with me, I wouldn't be so cranky ;)

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by AvantGarde » Tue Aug 29, 2017 10:10 pm

Dubious66 wrote:If people wouldn't f*k with me, I wouldn't be so cranky ;)


That's always the case. You can always make a card just saying "Fuck you very much" and hand it to them when they do it. On the back you can add "After receiving 3 of these, you get one free!"
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by hal » Wed Aug 30, 2017 5:48 am

:lol: :lol: :lol:
. . . all times I have enjoyed
Greatly, have suffered greatly, both with those
That loved me, and alone.
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by Dubious66 » Wed Aug 30, 2017 7:48 pm

AvantGarde wrote:You can always make a card just saying "Fuck you very much" and hand it to them when they do it. On the back you can add "After receiving 3 of these, you get one free!"


I am ordering a gross! Better make that 2!
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by AvantGarde » Wed Aug 30, 2017 10:37 pm

:lol: I'm glad I was able to help.

I would order for me as well, but in my language it just doesn't work. I might try something differnent. Balloon animals are always fun.
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by MochaAdmin » Fri Sep 01, 2017 11:42 am

Well, shit Dub.......I missed this too........ :oops:

I'm glad you got your old standby......you already know how it works/helps. Much better than starting on something you don't have any experience with.

If people wouldn't f*k with me, I wouldn't be so cranky ;)

when I get like that, people always give me plenty of leeway. My bite is def worse than my bark.......I have a feeling you can be the same way........ :twisted:

Good thing you got the Seroquel......:lol:

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by Dubious66 » Fri Sep 01, 2017 5:30 pm

MochaAdmin wrote:Well, shit Dub.......I missed this too........ :oops:



Good thing I have enough confidence in our relationship not to overanalyze or overpersonalize the neglect. If I have over-estimated, then I know where you live! Next time I'll just come camp out on your porch. ;). (Okay, I don't really know where you live but how many Mochas can there be? I can be tenacious.)

Appreciate you, you know,

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by Dubious66 » Tue Sep 12, 2017 4:50 am

Appointment number 2 with new pdoc today. harrumph.... Very ambivalent.
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by AvantGarde » Tue Sep 12, 2017 4:52 am

Good luck :)
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by Pancake » Tue Sep 12, 2017 5:00 am

Good luck!
Pdoc sounds kinda reasonable, like they listened to you last time? I hope today's appointment goes well.
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by Mocha » Tue Sep 12, 2017 11:49 am

Dubious66 wrote:Good thing I have enough confidence in our relationship not to overanalyze or overpersonalize the neglect. If I have over-estimated, then I know where you live! Next time I'll just come camp out on your porch. ;). (Okay, I don't really know where you live but how many Mochas can there be? I can be tenacious.)

def don't overanalyze or overpersonalize.....no need to. And you do have an idea of where I live......close enough, more than most folks......I'm sure you could track me down.......

I have just enough room for you to camp out on my porch......if you don't mind my neighbors stepping over you as they go in and out......lol
And I know exactly how tenacious you can be..... ;)

Appreciate you, you know,

dub

I appreciate and love you too.

EDIT: Good luck with the pdoc today. We'll be waiting for the report/update...... :)

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by Dubious66 » Tue Sep 12, 2017 5:24 pm

New pdoc is loving me. Wants to see me weekly. Mentioned the "m" word... Rambled about my head (apparently multiple stations running in your head is a problem. Seriously, that does drive me crazy. Can someone just turn the dial and tune it?) and body (not sleeping as much as I should and losing 10 pounds in 2 weeks) being over-activated. Wants me to take more seroquel. Wanted to chat sex and SI. We just met! Trusts that I would know when to go to ER. Clearly he doesn't know me ;)

I don't know...
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by Mocha » Tue Sep 12, 2017 6:09 pm

Dubious66 wrote:New pdoc is loving me. Wants to see me weekly. Mentioned the "m" word... Rambled about my head (apparently multiple stations running in your head is a problem. Seriously, that does drive me crazy. Can someone just turn the dial and tune it.) and body (not sleeping as much as I should and losing 10 pounds in 2 weeks) being over-activated. Wants me to take more seroquel. Wanted to chat sex and SI. We just met! Trusts that I would know when to go to ER. Clearly he doesn't know me ;)

I don't know...

Of course new pdoc loves you.....what's not to love?........ ;)

dub wrote:Mentioned the "m" word... Rambled about my head (apparently multiple stations running in your head is a problem. Seriously, that does drive me crazy. Can someone just turn the dial and tune it.)

the "m" word, eh? Hopefully the seroquel increase will help with the noise in your head. It must be truly annoying.

Wanted to chat sex and SI. We just met!

:lol:
Seriously though, I think it's a good idea to lay it all out there re: the SI girl. Sex is up to you..... ;)

Trusts that I would know when to go to ER. Clearly he doesn't know me ;)

Clearly.....:lol:

I'm so happy you're dealing with this head on. btw, will this dude be doing your therapy also?

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by Dubious66 » Tue Sep 12, 2017 6:47 pm

Mocha wrote:
I'm so happy you're dealing with this head on. btw, will this dude be doing your therapy also?


He is going to do both, which is good for me given my...med hesitancy? He is a faculty member of one of the med schools around here, so he knows his pharmacological shit. But he also has major training in psychotherapy, along with some other stuff. Mocha, you might not like him because he is older. I think I might because he has actually lived a life. He seems to have kept up to date on drug "advances." I think he might also call me out on some of my shit, which I need. Hence the, "well, what the heck are we going to talk about if you won't talk to me about two of the most important things about life: sex and death?" He gently ridiculed my BP hesitancy. That's a hard balance to strike with me. I need someone who can roll their eyes with me, but not at me...I think. I yammered about people who overmedicate their shit, refusing to learn better coping strategies and take responsibility for their behavior and after acknowledging that those people do exist, he poked back about "those people" who under-medicate. he didn't overpush but gently prodded. When I asked him about the dosage increase. I suggested 25. He came back with "50? 100? Titrate up. I'll see you next week and call if you need to." He seems to get that although I struggle with the BP label, I know my shit too, so if I can just get myself to buy into the need, I can be trusted to increase smartly. (plus, he promised not to threaten hospitalization unnecessarily,). Yammer.

At the end, he asked me if he was fired. I like his temperament.
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by Mocha » Tue Sep 12, 2017 7:00 pm

He is a faculty member of one of the med schools around here,

You had me there....... It told me he's going to be up to date with everything.

And I like his style. It sounds as though you two will be a good match and I'm glad you found him.

I had two different pdocs who did both my meds and therapy. It worked out really well, and I think it's going to work out great for you too.

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by AvantGarde » Tue Sep 12, 2017 10:49 pm

I like him ;) Sex and death are definitely important.
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